Commercial Script...
TO BE READ LOUDLY WITH EXTRA EMPHASIS ON KEY WORDS:
This season, ROX brings you the show that’s going to blow everyone away.
We are stretching the limits of the human body.
How long can one person make a doo-doo?
Ten grossly obese contestants will compete in doing what they do 2nd best.
Don’t believe what you’ve heard, size really does matter.
The longer, the better.
The thicker, the better.
See it for yourself in raw form… corn, popcorn kernels and all other ingredients.
This is what, you, America have been asking for.
Now you have it.
Starting Friday, November 3rd 7:00pm CST ROX rocks America.
TO BE READ VERY, VERY QUICKLY IN A HUSHED TONE:
Contestants using colon cleansers will be disqualified from competition.
Mysterious discolorations will be subject to testing.