Dear Santa,

I hope you get my letter. My mommy said she maled it snail male. I don’t know why she sent it with a snail because snails are really slow. Even slower than my turtle James.

It is very important that I know if I made it on the nice list this year. Mommy said that you try very hard to give every little boy and girl what they want for Christmas. I didn’t tell my daddy goodnight and that I loved him last time I talked to him on the phone. I am really sorry because that was naughty. I just miss him and wanted him to come home. Two days before Thanksgiving my daddy’s Lootenant came to our house to tell my mommy that he got kilt in the line of duty in Irack. I wish daddy wasn’t in that line. He should have raised his hand and said he had to go to the bathroom. That is what I do in school. Do you think daddy was mad at me because I didn’t say I love you? I tried to be really really good this year. I made my bed three times or maybe four. I hold my little sisters hand when I take her to her class even though my friend says girls have cooties. Do you know if that is true? Susie is in kindergardon and I am in first. I know I broke Susie’s doll but it was an axsadent, that’s the truth. And I am sorry that I punched Joey in school but he was picking on me. I asked mommy if I have been good and she said for the most part but I don’t know if she saw me taking a cookie the other day and I yelled at the dog for trying to eat my sock.

I really hope my being good is more than my being bad. Please say yes. You won’t even have to go out of your way. Mommy told my grandma that people don’t like to go out of their way. But if you say I am on your nice list then maybe when you are flying through the sky to give out presents you will see God. If you do can you give him the kisses and hugs I put in here and ask him to give them to my daddy? I hope you can find them, mommy says you can see everything. Do you know if my daddy has been good since he has been in heaven with God? Maybe you could ask God if my daddy can use the phone and call me. I promise I won’t be mad at him anymore. I just want to tell him goodnight and that I love him. I have been asking God to have him call me but maybe he doesn’t because he don’t want my mommy to cry anymore. Tell God she doesn’t cry all time just at night when she thinks I am sleeping.

I hope I have been good enough.

Tommy

Yo Santa,

What be up wid you? Hope all be okay down wid da elves and junk. I hear some people say you ain't real, I always thought you just didn't like me cause I didn't write every year. Or maybe you thought I be naughty? I don't know much anymore yo.

Santa, there be but one thing I want for Christmas, and nice as I am I don’t think you can give it here. There ain’t no Christmas in my hood man, and there ain’t no list I’m on, is there?

Listen here yo, I went down to the Salvation Army on Lenox and I hear them tell about what it means to be naughty. They talk about ‘no stealing, no wanting thy neighbors stuff’ and other junk. You know what? You be me for a day and tell me you don’t break any of those and say I’m naughty for it. Cause things work differently down here.

I steal yo, I do. I steal ‘cause I be nine years old and the only one here to take care of my brother Jaden. What I should do, let a three year old starve? Does it make me bad to steal some food and milk so that Lil’Jay don’t get no rickets or some shizznit?

Listen here fat man, yo, I mean phat, as in cool a’right? Nothing wrong wid bein’ fat if you are though, s’cool. Anyway, listen up. My daddy a druggie, a’right? He gone a long time, I don’t even ‘member what he looks like sometime. I walk down the street see all these men hangin’ on the stoop drinkin’ their fourties outa brown paper bags, anyone could be my dadi. When I see a man holdin’ on to his son, when I see a man singin’ to a babi on the subway, I shouldn’t get jealous? I shouldn’t get mad that I ain’t got that? That makes me naughty?

I don’t get you Santa, and I don’t think you’re even for folks like me. But if you are, if you see that I be nice, that I protect lil’Jay, I don’t let him get beat like me, I don’t let him get hurt, I don’t let him get hungry. If you see that I do what I can for my bro’, then give me the one thing I need?

I need my mom back man, I miss her. I just can’t do this alone no more. She held me, you know? The world was right with her holding Lil’Jay and me, even if it wasn’t really, even if we was hungry. So, I can’t be naughty man, cause I need my mom. Please?

I ain't in no gang and I ain't kill no one. I'm nice man, you gotta see I been nice. Just, give me my mom yo, just give her back.

Thanks man,

BigJ

                    December 12, 2006
Dear Santa,

My name is Billy Kenner. I live at Room 2112, Evergreen Motel, Route 3, Maple Island. When I wrote you last month, I lived at 127 Elm Street in Maple Island.

My mom and dad say we can go back to our house after the repairs from the fire are done. But that won't be by Christmas. I wanted to make sure you had my new address. That way you can find me on Christmas Eve (if you still want to).

I told mom and dad the truth about how the fire started, and they said it's not all my fault. They don't seem mad at me at all. They are hugging me and my sister a lot. And Tinkerbelle, who is our cat. But I still feel bad. I know you're really busy now, but I want to make sure you hear what happened, too. My mom says I'm always into trouble, and maybe she's right a lot of the time. But this time it was Tinkerbelle's fault. Tinkerbelle was surprised when the balloon popped, and she ran away. I think that's how the candle got knocked over.

My sister lit the candle before she went to baby sit for the Petersons. I wasn't even playing with the candle anymore, because Bobby Kelly and I were trying to make the balloon get bigger. Bobby and I are President and Vice President of the Kool Kordella Khemistry Klub. It's named for our elementary school, but we spelled the words funny on purpose.

Bobby thought we should use more vinegar and baking soda, and I thought we should use gas from the torch my dad has to fix the pipes. Bobby declared a thumb war, and I won. So we filled the balloon from the torch, because we were tired of blowing up balloons to surprise mom and all the vinegar and baking soda was making a mess. (I cleaned up the mess before the fire.) Then the balloon popped, and then the fire happened. It wasn't a good birthday for mom, I guess.

I hope you understand. I still really, really, really want the CHEM C4000 Ultimate Chemistry Set from Thames and Kosmos, with 460 experiments. It will be very educational and most of all it will be safe. It even has safety glasses. I promise not to use the alcohol burner unless my mom or dad is with me. If I had a CHEM C4000 Ultimate Chemistry Set, I could make a fire extinguisher in case Tinkerbelle ever gets scared and knocks over another candle. I bet there is a chemical that would work, but I can read the directions and find out.

If you bring the chemistry set.

Yours truly,

Billy Kenner

P.S. The fire burned up mom's birthday cake. Could you bring her a new one?

Dear Santa

Mommy told me I’d be on the naughty list if I didn’t eat all of my broccoli. YUCK!
You know I did not eat that gross stuff. You know everything. Mommy told me my sister is on the nice list cuz she ate her broccoli. Did you know that my sister said a bad word this year? She said jerk. And she said it to daddy. He smacked her butt with his belt. Mommy said daddy is on your nice list cuz he ate his broccoli. That’s not fair! He’s a grown up! He LIKES gross stuff like that. If my sister can say jerk to daddy and daddy can smack her with a belt and they are on the nice list then I should be on the nice list too. I didn’t say any bad words. I didn’t smack anybody. And do you know what else about mommy? She said she’s on the nice list cuz she ate her broccoli. But she’s being mean cuz she’s telling me that I’m not going to be on the nice list if I don’t eat my broccoli. That’s not nice at all. I didn’t tell anyone that they would not be on the nice list. So you see Santa, I’m nice. I won’t tell you to put me on the nice list because you’re the one with the big white beard and that makes you wise. But I want to suggest that you have to make a choice. You can put me on the nice list with mommy and daddy and my sister. Or you can put me on the nice list and put mommy and daddy and my sister on the naughty list. But if you do that, Christmas will be ruined and you will be out of a job. So you should just throw away the naughty list and put everyone on the nice list.

Love Tucker

Dear Santa,

How are things at the North Pole? I hope everyone is healthy. I know from the movies that reindeer can get sick if it’s too hot, so I was worried with all the global warming. I’m going to be a vet when I grow up, so maybe I can live with you and help take care of Rudolph and the rest of them.

I know you see us when we’re sleeping and when we’re awake, but I’m guessing you don’t really have time to watch every kid on the planet 24 hours a day. So, I am writing this letter to make sure you have the full story about what has been going on this year between my brother and me.

Most people think Billy is a troublemaker, but he really isn’t; it just looks that way sometimes. Last summer, when he pushed me in the pond, I had been playing with matches and accidentally set my pants on fire. It may have looked like a mean trick, but Billy actually saved my life that day. And when he stole all my Halloween candy, he was just worried about my blood sugar levels; he didn’t want me to catch diabetes.

But if there were one thing that might have gotten his name on the wrong list this year, it would probably be the incident with the super glue.

I guess just about everybody thought it was a cruel thing to do, but they never bothered to find out his reasons. The thing is, I had a bad case of lice. And there were deer ticks too. But, Mom and Dad refused to shave my head, no matter how much Billy pleaded. They didn’t believe that I was infested. So, together Billy and I came up with a foolproof plan.

The chemicals in super glue are deadly to insects; we tried it on an ant to be sure. The idea was to kill all the bugs with the glue, and then let it dry in my hair. Mom and Dad would have no choice but to shave my head, getting rid of any survivors.

Billy took all the punishment for it, even though we thought of it together; Mom said he was old enough to know better. You can’t really blame him for being a little mad at me. After all, I was cured of bugs, and he was grounded for two weeks.

You can see that Billy isn’t really the naughty boy people think he is. It wouldn’t be fair if you believed all the bad things without knowing the truth. Billy is a good boy and deserves as many presents as me. In fact, he probably deserves more, since I started most of the trouble.

Your friend,
Charlie Fisher

---

As the young boy dropped the envelope into the mailbox, a smile spread across his face. Billy was confident his letter would fool an old guy like Santa. Christmas morning was going to be great.

Dear Ho-Ho,

I’m sorry I was scared of you when you visited me at daycare. I forgot you were big. Your suit is red. I like pink better.

I am a good girl. Whatever Mom says I did, I didn’t do. Mia did it. Even though Mom says I’m lying. Like dumping all the juice mix in my cowboy hat. Mia held the hat. And when I hit her on the head, it was because she ran into my hand. And then she fell down. I didn’t push her.

When the tree fell down, it was because I pulled it with my hand, and when I tried to push it back, it didn’t do it. It kept going down. I told the tree it was bad for falling down. But Mom said it was my fault.

When Mom was working on her story, I helped. I pushed lots of buttons. Mom said that was bad, too. I think Mom gets mad for no reason sometimes. I told her I wanted to play my snowman game and that it was my turn to use the computer. She didn’t listen to me.

We visited my Grandma and Grandpa tonight, and they yelled at me too. I told Grandma that the puppy spilled her food. That puppy is magic. She doesn’t have to be in the house to make a mess.

I told you when you visited that I want a pink pony. Mom said that only good girls get pink ponies, and that I’m not a good girl. But it’s hard to be good when you’re three. And I’m a big girl that uses the potty now, so that should count for something. I’m trying very hard, and I think that sometimes what Mom says is bad is me being me. Besides, she doesn’t know it, but I can see her try not to laugh when I try to fix eggs for breakfast.

Ho-Ho, I hope that you can come visit me again. Don’t forget to bring my pink pony!

Love,

Rina

AUTHOR’S NOTE : I SO wish this was fiction. ;)

Dear Santa,

Mommy told me I’m on the naughty list because I told her I kissed a girl in a private place. I kissed her in the closet. Mommy and daddy don’t go to a private place when they kiss. I saw them kiss in the living room and in the kitchen and sometimes in the dining room. You can put them on the naughty list if you want but it wont matter because they don’t play with toys anyway. So if you don’t bring them toys I don’t think they will care. Kissing girls should not make me be put me on the naughty list because kissing is not naughty. I saw mommy kiss you by our Christmas tree last Christmas. I want to be just like mommy so if she gets to kiss lots of boys then I get to kiss lots of girls. And you and Mrs. Clause kiss. I saw you kiss on TV yesterday. I used to think kisses and hugs were good things. I still do but they’re not such good things if they make me be put on the naughty list. You know how love is don’t you Santa. You can try to hide from it but the girls will find you. That’s what happened when I kissed the girl in the closet. I was hiding from love and she found me. So it’s really her fault and she should be on the naughty list. But you shouldn’t put her on the naughty list because we are getting married when we’re grown up so we will be kissing a lot in the future anyway.

Love,
Timmy

P.s. If you want to bring me a flashlight for Christmas along with all of my other presents I sure could use it next time I’m in the closet.

Dear Santa,

My mom told me to write you a letter to make sure I get presents this year. I think because mom and dad live at different houses and I need to tell you to go to both houses. I have did alot better this year at being good. Mom says I have been rotten and might get coal but dad said mom was trying to say she was going to get coal for being mean to daddy. Is she? This year for Christmas I wanted to get an art set but dad said I should get something that is loud and makes a lot of noise so now I want a toy gun that lights up and makes real gun sounds and please put that present at my moms house for me to open, cuz dad said toy guns don’t work at his house. Mom told me to tell you the bad things id done this year but I couldn’t remember anything so I asked dad to help me. Dad said i didn’t do any bad things just that I need to do more good things for mom. So today I painted moms room when she was taking a nap on the couch. I drawed really good to pictures of animals and trees. Mom liked it lots cuz she said oh wow and got tears in her eyes. Dad said that means shes proud of me. Dad told me to cook brakfest for mom to be good so I made her favorite blue berry muffins for her. I think they would have tasted real good but the oven broke and made everything start on fire. Mommy called the firemen and they came and helped fix our oven. It was fun and I think mom must have liked it to cuz dad said he wished he could have seen moms face. I also want a football so dad and I can play catch together and he told me I should practice when im at moms house to get better. He told me to practice my catch and dive in the living room because it is safe there. Thank you Santa and I will try to do more nice things for my mom.

From, James

Dear Santa,

My name is Timmy and I am in the 3rd grade. I want a lectric scooter to ride to school cause my mom says that after the snow is gone I have to start walking to school myself cause Im a big boy and school is 3 really long blocks far. I want a Playstation cause Billy said its really cool and I want a race car bed. I cut out a picture of the bed for you cause I asked for it last year and I didnt get it so I thought you might be confused. Mom says your really old.

I have been really really REALLY good this year. Dont listen to that stupid judge. My daddy told him it wasnt my fault. Mr Johnson always yells at me when I let Puddles go on his lawn. Hes so mean. So I tipped over his garbage can. The fifth time I did it I guess it rolled into the street and the lady hit it with her big car and it flew into Mr Johnsons roses and smashed them all. Boy was he mad. Puddles wagged his tail a lot.

Mr Johnson made the policeman come and he was mean to me too. But my daddy is a lawyer and we got to go explain it all to the judge. Daddy told him that I didnt have the mens ray to smash Mr Johnsons roses. I dont know what a mens ray is, but maybe you could bring me one of those too.

The judge told my daddy that what I really didnt have was a daddy who knew how to take care of his business and he made daddy give Mr Johnson lots of money. That judge was just a big poopoohead.

Daddy SAYS I didnt do it but when we got home he was really mad at me and told me not to walk past Mr Johnsons house any more. How can you get in trouble for something you didnt do?

Then there was that big fight at school with the broken windows, but daddy told the principal that wasnt my fault either. My daddy is so smart.

I been so really good this year I really hope I get a race car bed just like in the picture. And a big shiny mens ray too.

Merry Christmas,

Timmy

Dear Santa,

I was at the store the other day. The store that is one really big store but there are hundreds of stores in it. Mommy calls that place the mawl.

I don't know if you remember me I had on a dora the exlporer shirt. Anyways santa, there was something I really really wished for, but when I was on your lap, I couldn't remember the name of the place mommy said Daddy will living for a while. Everyone calls it over there but I know that can be under my bed where my peanut butter samich is hiding, or in the litter box where I made that sand castle another day. I am sorry for crying at you. It wasn't your fault. I was crying because I couldn't remember the name of that place. I wanted you to hear my wish really badly. I forget stuff alot, and I can't help it. I know you are so busy on Christmas eve, and I already ruined my wish at the big store, but We are sending you a note today in school and I need one more wish Santa! Please I'll be good all year! I wrote it down, Mommy said it's Iwak, where daddy is. I wanted to ask you to bring my daddy home safe from Iwak, and too Santa I wanted to tell you that Mommy and I can't mail cookies there by Christmas because it takes too long. Daddy likes the ones with the chocolate smashed in the middle, from Freprije Farm.

Love,
The girl from the mawl with the dora shirt on.