Pet Personals 2

Pet Personals 2

"Loving home needed."
Contest ended 5 years ago 4/3/2007 12:00:00 AM EDT

Contest Info

  • Cost: 2 credits
  • Jackpot: 39 credits

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First Place
# 1
By Larvice (Score: 6.79)
8

12 foot Boa looking for loving family. Likes all pets and small children. Last family disappeared.

Word count: 16
 
Second Place
# 2
By cliknsnap (Score: 6.77)
5

Quiet, non-shedding, non-allergenic, easy-keep female. Bright yellow blond.

I pay my way by recycling plant material or animal droppings into rich potting soil.

Think how prestigious it would be to own a cousin of the University of California, Santa Cruz, mascot.

My life is at risk from over zealous Adidas. Won't you consider making me a cherished member of your household?

Hopefully yours,

A. C. Bananaslug

Word count: 66
 
Third Place
# 3
By scsonka (Score: 6.765)
4

Single white feline, seven lives still remaining, seeks human or humans for affection, sustenance, and absolute servitude. Enjoys eating, sleeping, playing coy, sharpening claws, and meowing spontaneously between 2AM and 5AM. Clean and sober from catnip for over six months. Ideal person(s) has black clothes and black furniture, hates dogs passionately, and can open a door or fill a dish on command.
Reply to DreamKitten44806, this paper.

Word count: 68
 
4
By DoubleD83 (Score: 6.484)
1

Female Chihuahua looking for a slower lifestyle. New owner must not be a heiress to anything, non-drinker/partier, and ok with not dressing me up. Owner must not own any type of video recording devices and has to dress modestly. I hate the color pink and being stuffed in small confined handbags. Teenagers and twenty-something’s need not apply.

Word count: 57
 
5
By cliknsnap (Score: 6.145)
0

Two-year-old "fixed" male in formal dress.

Comfortable lap a must. Will travel but complain loudly during same. Favorite food is canned. Prefer to sleep under the bed covers in order to massage companion's larynx.

No bad habits unless you include drape climbing, fly eating, and hairball barfing.

I promise to not use your closet's back corner as a litter box.

Tuxedo Tom

Word count: 62
 
6
By whatevermj (Score: 6.096)
1

Widower looking to get back into the swing of things, former owner was a little old lady, only walked me to church and back. Must love to give belly rubs, and be understanding of the occasional leg hump, I'm not a hound dog, mistakes happen. Non-smoked treats preferred. Attractive feet a plus!

Word count: 52
 
7
By diogenese19348 (Score: 5.983)
0

Dog, neutered/up to date shots/pedigree ISO family that enjoys long walks, playing frisbee, pampering, and slipping food under the table. Fenced in back yard a plus. Also like scratching behind ears and heavy licking. Stay at home mom preferred. Turn offs: Watch dog work, stupid pet tricks, getting nose rubbed in carpet. NO CATS!

Word count: 54
 
8
By Kookaburra (Score: 5.898)
1

FWM (fluffy white male) 9 years old looking for new situation. Previous family moved out of area leaving me behind; living on the street for 3 months. Beneath a tough exterior I am a softie; love to snuggle and lick. I am a one man dog who will give you total devotion once I trust you. Ask for Sharif on Locust St.

Word count: 62
 
9
By cakeladybarb (Score: 5.881)
0

I'm an eager companion.
You throw it, I'll catch it.
You run, I'll run too.
You sit, I'll sit by your side.
You eat it, I'll share it.
You get scared, I'll protect you.
You're sad, I'll comfort you.
You need someone, I need you.
We're a team, you and I.
Please take me with you!

Word count: 56
 
0

Adorable, bouncy, brown-eyed female,
interested in running, snuggling and hunting,
seeks male who loves a good romp,
scratching, commands, and doesn't
mind using leashes and collars.
Must be willing to get dirty; don't worry
I'll lick you clean if you take me home!
(No vets please!)

Word count: 46
 

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