1: Make certain that electrical current connected to the apparatus using the incandescent artificial illumination device by polymer-insulated high-conductivity wire has been terminated, and remove any protective coverings or shades.

2: Remove the expired incandescent artificial illumination device from the grooved socket of the apparatus by placing all four fingers and thumb of one hand around the perimeter of the silica-based semi-transparent filament enclosure, twisting laterally in a counter-clockwise direction. Make sure that the incandescent device's silica-based enclosure has decreased to a reasonable temperature before attempting this step, and use your other hand (or an assistant) to steady the apparatus as needed.

3: Discard the expired incandescent device into a proper waste receptacle. Use caution, as shattering the silica-based semi-transparent filament enclosure could be dangerous, resulting in lacerations or other injury.

4: Remove the replacement incandescent device from the cellulose-based packaging, gripping the silica-based enclosure in a manner similar to that used to grip the silica-based enclosure of the expired device.

5: Position the threaded screw-base of the incandescent device into the grooved socket of the apparatus and rotate laterally in a clockwise direction until resistance is detected, steadying the apparatus as needed. Once resistance is detected, cease rotating the device.

6: Replace any protective coverings or shades that were removed from the apparatus, and discard the cellulose-based packaging into a proper waste receptacle. Confirm that the artificial illumination device was installed correctly by imparting electrical current to the device through the polymer-insulated high-conductivity wires connected to the apparatus.

Prepare by secreting a previously procured object in the approximate central inside area between the fingers and thumb, left or right depending on preference. Close fingers firmly around object and do not open until arm is fully extended.

At the time of choosing, start from a situation in which vertical alignment is apparent and once this stage has been reached, bend one leg and descend in a relaxed fashion until one knee is set firmly on chosen underlying surface. Secure a safe and solid body position before proceeding any further. In case of extreme nervousness do not hesitate to bend second leg as well. While this is not the prescribed method, it is generally deemed an acceptable alternative.

Raise head slowly until eye contact with subject has been established. When executed correctly, a release of moisture from one or both of the subject's tear-ducts should be seen to commence at this point. Breathe deeply several times before forcing air out of lungs setting vibrations of vocal chords in motion. In conjuction with vibrations extend and raise arm 30 to 35 degrees. When arm is at full extension, turn hand with palm facing upward and slowly release fingers to reveal the up-to-then concealed spherical object, ensuring the object stays rested in the aforementioned central area of the palm. Place other hand under extended elbow for support if necessary.

When vocal chords have come to a complete stop, proceed to present spherical object to subject and wait for an affirmative.

Place the right arm at an angle of approximately 90° relative to your torso. Extend the index finger fully as if to point at an object. Bring the arm closer to the body by 45°. The index finger should now be pointing directly at the nostril area.

Move the arm upward in a counterclockwise direction until the index finger is resting between the fibro fatty tissue and the greater alar cartilage. Confirm that the “angle of attack” is correct for nostril entry, adjusting as needed.

Move the arm upward to introduce the index finger into the nostril cavity. Do NOT go deeper than the first knuckle! You may feel a slight resistance, or wetness. Rotate the hand counterclockwise, dragging the fingernail along the inter-nasal wall. There may be a pulling sensation. Do not be alarmed - this is normal.

Once the hand has rotated approximately 120°, crook the index finger slightly and move the arm in a downward motion. Be prepared to grab any “hangers” you may encounter as the finger is removed.

Restore the arm to the original 90° position and focus your vision on the tip of the index finger. Move the index finger in a circular motion over the surface of the thumb for approximately ten revolutions. Curl the index finger so that it comes to rest just inside the knuckle of the thumb. Apply pressure with the index finger in an outward direction, resisting until it moves forward forcibly in a “flicking” motion. Repeat as necessary.

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If you followed the steps on the previous page correctly, the shirt should be on your body and in the proper position for buttoning.

Grasp both sides of your shirt just below the collar. There is a button there, but if you wold like to leave this one undone for whatever reason, move your hands down slowly and evenly until you encounter the next highest button with the fingers of your right hand. Your left hand should now be on or very near the corresponding buttonhole.

Using your left thumb and index finger, pinch this side at the bottom of the buttonhole, holding the fabric at a 90 degree angle to your body. Then pinch the button between your right thumb and index finger and approach the button hole in your left hand. Push the button halfway through.

At this point, Your right index finger will be pressing against the cloth surrounding the button hole. Lift your right index finger and place it over the cloth, grasping both the button and the cloth now covering it. While holding this, pinch the button between you left thumb and index finger and pull it the rest of the way through.

The button should now be properly positioned through the buttonhole. Slowly and evenly, run your fingers down until you encounter the next button, and its corresponding hole. Repeat the above process all the way down the shirt until all buttons have been fastened.

Materials Needed:
1 Open Box of cereal
1 Carton of milk.

First, find a bowl to pour the milk and cereal in. A bowl will be found with your dishes, it is one that is deep so that it holds liquids (such as soup). Make sure it does not have holes in the bottom (such as a colander), or all the milk will fall out when you pour it. Next you will need a spoon. There are three types of utensils, a knife, that would slice, a fork that would poke holes, and a spoon, shaped sort of like the bowl with a handle. Make sure the spoon is the proper size to fit in your mouth comfortably, serving spoons are generally too big unless you are a talk show host.

Pour the Cereal and milk in the bowl, and pick up a spoon-full of it. Now put it in your mouth. Your mouth is the large opening on your face between your nose and your chin. If the cereal just dribbles down your chin, it means your mouth was closed. Open it, as if you were talking, and try again. If this step causes pain, you are probably trying to force the cereal up your nose. Check a mirror to see where it is going.

Once you have the cereal in your mouth, close it (your mouth that is) around the spoon, then pull the spoon out. Chew and swallow the cereal, then repeat until the bowl is empty.

Once in a standing position (refer to previous lesson: Standing) keep your legs straight, body and shoulders upright with arms hanging loosely beside it.

Lean a little bit to the right, to take some weight of your left leg and shift it to your right leg. Lift you left leg by bringing your knee up and bending the bottom half of your leg by 30 degrees backwards, causing your left foot to be lifted from the ground.

Stop lifting the knee any further once your left foot is approximately 20cm from the ground. While your left leg is suspended in the air, lean your body forward while lifting only the heel of your right foot 5cm, making sure the front of your right foot is firmly on the ground carrying your body weight. Keep your arms relaxed, let it move with your body. Focus on your legs and feet.

Bring your left leg down 30cm further forward than the right legs current position, by leaning your body slightly forward while starting to straighten your left knee. As your left foot touches the ground (heel first, then toes), lean a bit forward and to the left to shift your body weight now to your left leg and take some of the right leg.

Now follow the same steps above for moving the right leg! Remember to replace all the rights and lefts with lefts and rights.

Next lesson: How to turn around.

Select appropriate material. Material may vary from user to user but in most cases will be a thin amalgamation of fibrous cellulose held together by hydrogen bonding.

Center left hand (please reverse hand indications for left-hand use,) with fingers spread, beneath either face of the material. Maintaining a firm grip on material, curl fingers toward center of hand. Material should flex along with fingers towards its center – if not, abort process immediately or injury may result. If necessary, press lightly on center of material with right hand. Right hand should be withdrawn before completion of this step or injury may result.

Bring right hand to top of material and press down firmly until contact is made with left hand. Withdraw hand. Material should maintain its shape. If it does not, insufficient pressure was applied, please return to previous step.

If desired, rotate material until long axis is vertical and apply pressure between hands again. Final shape of material should be roughly spheroid.

If container is at least partially empty, take material in right hand, lift over mouth of container and release. If container is already full, place material within container and apply pressure until level of fill is below top edge of container. After pressure is released, level of fill may return to original state and your material may exit the container. Leave area immediately if this occurs.

WARNING: Projecting material toward container over horizontal distance is contraindicated. Injury to other persons and/or humiliation to user may result.

Begin from a starting position in front of the device. Identify the circular mechanism on the forward facing frame located 3/8ths the distance from the bottom of the device to the top of the device.

Once identified, prepare the arm closest to the device by moving your arm at the shoulder joint away from your body until the position of your shoulder to elbow is at a down angle 45 degrees from your torso. Move your forearm to the angle of your elbow in relation to your positioned upper arm is 90 degrees. Extend the hand on your positioned arm so it is level with your positioned forearm. Extend all 5 fingers outward then retract your pinky, ring, and middle fingers into a fist position. After the retraction of those fingers, retract your thumb to rest on top of those fingers (your thumb model may differ). Your index finger should now be extended and level with your hand.

Line up the tip of your extended index finger with previously identified circular mechanism on the device. Mildly, proceed to extend your arm toward the circular device until contact has been made with your extended finger. Apply necessary, but not excessive, force on the circular device until depressed. For a time no shorter or longer than 1 second keep index finger on the circular mechanism. Then pull back on your arm to remove your index finger. You will see lights blink on the device. If not, repeat.

Take your remote control device and visually locate the channel changing buttons. Normally there will be two - one for up and one for down. For this example, we are going to suggest the 'DOWN' button is used as 'UP' is often taken to be more difficult.

While holding the remote control unit in your left hand, extend the primary digit on your right hand (hereafter known as the index finger). It may also be prudent to curl the remaining fingers into the palm of the hand to avoid accidental strikes on other buttons. The thumb should be fully extended outward to ensure proper stability of the hand during any and all movement. While having the remote control unit pointed towards the television, slowly bring the aforementioned index finger down in a clear and clean fashion toward the visually targeted button. Only a small amount of pressure is generally required to activate the interface but some people may need more. Be warned that in some instances using too much pressure may result in damage to the control interface, and in some extreme cases, your finger.

Once the button has been pressed a proper visual check of the television screen will be required to ensure that sufficient pressure, and indeed the correct button, was pressed. If for whatever reason the channel has not been changed it is recommend that you consult the manufacturers handbook for further fault finding.

To change the light bulb, you must first understand the light bulb.

Look at it. Behold a perfect fusion of technology and design. Admire its curved sides, perfectly shaped to allow you to grasp the glass bulb and gently twist. It is crucial to note that the bulb must be removed from the socket with a counter-clockwise turn; that is to say, contrary to the motion of the hands on a clock.

(If you are standing in front of a clock, you will observe that the hands revolve so that after pointing at the 12, they turn and point at the 1. You must twist the bulb in the opposite direction, counter-clockwise.)

Alas, the light bulb's incandescent filament has burned out. Cast the useless thing into the garbage with the other trash.

Though the room is dark, do not despair. Salvation is encased within this cardboard package — remove the light bulb and prepare it for deployment.

(If additional bulbs remain in the package, place them in the closet against the day of this bulb's inevitable failure.)

Place the silver-colored standard E26 Edison screw base into the lamp's socket, and gently twist the bulb in a clockwise fashion. Remember, clockwise is consistent with the motion of the hands on a clock. Once the bulb is firmly set in place, activate the lamp's "on" switch.

Congratulations — the process is at last complete. But remain ever vigilant, for the time will come when you must once again meet the challenge of this arduous task.