It's the month of hauntings and hooligans. Forget about those sweet inscriptions, we're looking for funny, cynical, "I got the last word, from the grave" engravings.

I meant to be funny ere I passed,
But I thunk too slow and sunk too fast,
And now I've no witty epitaph.

The dearly departed can be whomever you like, but be warned, that cold draft you feel at the back of your neck may not be a breeze! (cue the creepy organ music)

Mwahahahaha!

The rules of the game are thus: Write an amusing epitaph for a grave marker.

Keep in mind that profanity is not acceptable. All entries must be in accordance with our text rules and guidelines. As always, quality is a must. You will have 7 days for this contest, so make your submission count.

Word Limit: 100. Entries longer than 100 words will be disqualified.