The Easter Bunny DID bring your basket, but he hid it very, very well. He told me where it is, but I can't tell you. If you haven't found it by tomorrow, I can give it to you after school.

The Easter Bunny's GPS somehow got broken, so he couldn't find his way here. But he called, and said he'd bring it here before you get out of school tomorrow.

The Easter Bunny thought today was Saturday and he had one more day. He'll bring it while you're at Grandma's house this afternoon.

3. Because I forgot to feed the cats.

2. Because he was in the W1k chat & lost track of time.

1. Because he was up against johnnytitan in the HxH.

Top Three Reasons The Easter Bunny Missed My House

Reason #3: I don't live in the Playboy Mansion

Reason #2: My wife's rabbit fur coat was hanging on the clothes line.

And the #1 Reason...The house still smelled of the rabbit stew the family had for dinner.

1) Pope John Paul II forgave us killing Jesus, but the Easter Bunny didn't get the memo.

2) The Easter bunny did try to make his annual rounds. Where do you think we got the shank bones and roasted eggs for our Seders?

3) It's not a stereotype... Jews are just that cheap.

Child: “Mommy, why isn’t there any Easter candy?”
Parent: “Well, honey, you see…

“…Mommy and Daddy did some research and found out that Easter Sunday isn’t even when Jesus was resurrected! So we left a note for the Easter Bunny telling him not to come.”

“…I forgot to lock Sparkles in his cage. But hey, if the President dies the Vice President takes his place… so today the Vice Easter Bunny was put into office for the first time and doesn’t know how to do his job.”

“…With the recession the economy has been in it’s getting more and more expensive to mass produce chocolate; especially in the shape of bunnies. Can you imagine how much those molds must cost? The Easter Bunny is so in debt that he left us an ”˜I owe you’. Good news: you get double the candy next year.

3. The Easter bunny was afraid of the scary bleeding man on the cross on your door

2. He saw the the large skinning shed and NRA bumper sticker on your car

1. He decided you apparently don't care about his holiday since you still have CHRISTMAS lights up!

Third reason the Easter Bunny skipped our place:

Bugs Bunny was delicious!

Second Reason:

Roger Rabbit was delicious!

First Reason:

The freezer is empty again...

-Santa told the Easter Bunny that you had some left over "naughty time". Wouldn't you rather get no basket than more coal for Christmas?
-I swear saw the Easter baskets around this morning. Maybe you should keep looking.
-The Easter bunny saw how cluttered this house was and couldn't bear to come inside. Maybe you should have done your chores like you were told!

... your biology teacher should have told you that it is impossible for rabbits to lay eggs; chocolate ones or otherwise!

... of a deadly new strain of 'Myxomatosis Cacao Ovum'. It effects rabbits, eggs, chocolate and humans during the month of April.

... Peter, our new pet python, intercepted the delivery. Ooops.

3. Oooops, sorry I forgot to take down the "No Visitor Allowed" sign at the door.
2. My key chain has a rabbit foot attached to it.
1. We are having rabbit soup for dinner.