How I met _____  _____.

How I met _____ _____.

"I was walking my canary in the park and ...."
Contest ended 2 years ago 5/30/2010 12:00:00 AM EDT

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First Place
# 1
4

While I was the night time manager working at the local Ramada, I got word that a big celebrity was coming in to stay. No one was to know who the celebrity was, or which room this person was going to be standing. The celebrity was Dolly Parton.

I found out what room she was going to be in and with my own money had flowers waiting in the room for her. The flowers did have a note, "If you are in need of ANYTHING, please let me know".

I signed my name and job position on the bottom. I think I did add a heart.

I did all my duties that night. We had a full restaurant, a full night club, and the hotel was nearly at capacity. I did find myself going back to the room service department, in case Ms. Parton wanted to order. On the fifth time, the call came in. When the room service girl picked up the tray, I followed her to the hallway.

"This woman who you're going to deliver this food to, is a very important guest to the hotel. Just bring her the food, drop it off and leave, okay?"

"Okay", she said, but now her eyes were big as saucers.

I waited at the room service elevator door, waiting for the attendant's return. It seem like an eternity. Then the door opened, the attendant was all smiles.

"How did it go?"

"It must have went well, she tipped me twenty dollars."

There was no mention of whom she had just delivered food to, just the fact she had gotten a nice tip.


The next day when I went in to work, the General Manager meet me at the door.

"I need to see you in the office", he said.

A millions thoughts went through my head. Did Ms. Parton have a complaint? Did I put too much attention on her, and miss something with another guest? Did something happen after I left? I was confused to say the least.

"So what happened between you and Dolly Parton last night?"

"What? I never met the woman, I just made sure her food looked great and that she wasn't disturbed".

"Well, she wrote a note, and it was on my desk this morning."

"Oh my God", I said to myself, "what did I miss?"

The General Manager picked up a folded piece of paper on his desk and started reading.

"I want to thank everyone involved for my pleasant stay here in your hotel. You're food was wonderful and I got some much needed sleep. I was hoping that whomever was in charge last night would do me the honor of escorting me to my bus when it arrives at 5:30. Thank you again and I'm looking forward to coming back in this area and staying in your hotel. Love, Dolly."

My General Manager refolded the note and handed it to me.

"It looks like you're walking Dolly to her bus, you lucky s.o.b."

I looked at my watch, it was 3:30. I raced around the entire hotel to make sure everything was right with all the departments. Then, I felt myself transforming, into something I've never been before. Super nerd fan. I went to the employee locker room and put on more cologne. I sprayed my hair. Twice. Check my teeth for any debris. A mouth full of breath mints. It was 5:25.

I raced to the elevator and punch the button like I've seen children do, time and time again. I got on and went to her floor. I walked the hallway, my heart felt like it was going to explode. I got to her door and looked at my watch, it was 5:29. I didn't want to knock yet, I didn't want to be early, I wanted to be on time. So like a deranged stalker, I just stood at her door, checking my watch every ten seconds. Then I check it for the last time, it was 5:30. I knocked on her door.

There she was, just as beautiful as her pictures. She was shorter then I had imagined, but so what. She looked stunning, and she smelled like a field of fresh flowers.

"Are you Richard?" she said.

"Yes I am, how did you know my name?"

"It was on the card with those beautiful flowers you sent me."

Dolly Parton knew my name, was I in Heaven.

"I believe I'm to escort you to your bus?" putting my arm out towards her. She took my arm and we walked down the hallway. I pushed the elevator button and waited with her. When the elevator came, we both walked in, still arm in arm.

"Thank you for everything" she said on the way down.

"I just wish I would've done more", I said.

The elevator door opened. It seemed to only take seconds. Still arm and arm we walk towards the side entrance to the hotel, where her bus was waiting. I walked her all the way towards the door. "Well, here we are", I reluctantly said.

"Thank you for the escort", she said with a big smile.

"The pleasure was all mine", I said while cornily gripping my heart.

She grabbed both my arms and stood on her tip-toes and kissed me on my cheek. Then she giggled like a school child and thanked me again. I was in shock, and what a great feeling it was.

I stood at the door and watched the bus pull away. I could still smell her. I could still feel her lips on my cheek.

This happened over twenty years ago, but I still can smell her perfume, and I can still feel her kiss. It was one of the best moments in my life.

Word count: 968
Please do not critique my entry.

I can't listen to a country song and not think of this moment in my life.

 
2
By BBMu1 (Score: 5.236)
4

The police station looked exactly how I had imagined: quiet, relaxed, two cops behind a desk watching the Royals game and staying cool behind a fan. I guess that’s what you get for living in a small town in Kansas with one stoplight. Still, I wished the place actually looked legitimate.

Officer Alton, a stout man stuck in an attentive stance with his chest out and his hands in his pockets, took me down the hallway to a cracked window that looked into a small room with five men. “The suspects are in there,” he said, as though I couldn’t tell. “The game is easy, Miss Perry. You point out your man, we’ll have him in the Logan County Courthouse by tomorrow afternoon. And it’s a one-way mirror, so you don’t have to worry about them seeing you.” He pressed an intercom button and said, “Line up, boys. You know your position.” Then he turned to me and grinned. “You just take it all in, Miss Perry.” He barked out orders into the intercom, telling them to turn left, turn right, stand up straight. When they faced the front, they gave the occasional, startling illusion of eye contact.

“It’s hard to tell which one did it,” I said.

“Yeah, that’s all normal,” Alton said, “it’s easy to get nervous when you’re pointing out the whack job who almost took your life.” He looked at me, arms still in his pockets. “Just out of curiosity, Miss Perry, did he make out with what he wanted?”

I shrugged, kept my eyes on the scowling brutes. “I don’t know what he wanted. But he didn’t take any money, if that’s what you’re asking.”

Alton frowned and looked back at the suspects. I had it down to two of them: one shorter man with a red beard, one taller with darker, thicker facial hair. Both had short hair, blue eyes, and a pointed nose. They could have been brothers.

“Have it narrowed down, at least?” Alton asked.

“Yeah,” I said, sighing and crossing my arms, “I think it’s number three or number five.”

“Okay, the bearded fellas,” he said, nodding, “there’s a pretty big difference in height between the two.”

“I guess.”

“You remember how tall he was?”

Of course not, you twit, otherwise I’d have picked the guy out already. But instead of that I said, “He seemed like a big guy.”

“Great,” he clasped his hands happily like a car salesman who’d just sold the thirty grand special. “We’ll go with number five, then?”

I didn’t answer right away. “Tell you what, “ Alton said, noticing my hesitance, “we’ll take number five to court tomorrow. We’ll keep number three in custody just to be safe, tell him he’s not off just yet. Then if five really makes his case, we’ll come back and grab three. Sound good?”

I nodded my head, not having a choice. “Okay,” I said.

That night I couldn’t sleep. I kept replaying the scene in my head, trying to verify my decision at the police station: I only got one glance at his face through the closet door as he paraded around my house with a pistol telling me to come out of hiding. But then the cops came and he fled. No clear look at his face; he would remain a dangerous mystery.

My bed sheets were hot and damp with sweat. I tossed and turned for hours, listening to my breath and the crinkling of the sheets. I got up to get a glass of water. In the kitchen, I sat at the table watching the front door, waiting.

The bedroom had cooled off when I returned, thanks to the crisp, cool air that came in from the bedside window. A passing thought quickly ended my comfort:

Did I open that window?

I stuck my head out and looked around. Dark silence covered the Kansas desert, but I had to be sure I was alone. I left through the front door and walked around the house, my feet crunching against the dead grass.

In the backyard, the bulkhead door was propped open.

I ran back into the house to find my cell phone. It wasn’t on the nightstand. I tried not to panic. I began to run down the road toward my neighbor’s house, a mile south.

I ran for half a mile without stopping. The adrenaline had awakened a ghost inside of me, one with quick legs and limitless stamina. I caught my breath for a moment, looked back down the lonely, desert road. My breaths were heavy, like the roar of a motor. My breaths got louder. I looked back again and realized that the sound wasn’t my breath at all ”“ it was a truck was driving toward me. I stood there in the road, all alone, frozen, the windswept sand whipping at my nightgown.

The truck stopped just shy of my limp body. The adrenaline was gone now. I felt like I was underwater, gasping for breath miles under a black ocean. The truck kicked up dust into my face. A man got out, his dark silhouette pressed against the even darker night.

Two shots, two gunshots and I was down on the ground. He stood over me and smiled beneath his red beard. “Should have picked number three,” he said, resting his foot on my stomach. Everything started to go blurry. I gasped for air to stay conscious.

“Why?” I said, my head lulled back in surrender.

“Because my client has a problem with you, Sarah. And he hired me to finish you.” He walked back toward the car, pleased with his work, no fingerprints, no blood on his jacket. Nothing left behind.

“Laura,” I said. The bearded man peered over his open car door, curious now. “It’s Laura,” I said. “Sarah is my neighbor.” I watched his face twist into horrified shock. Without a word, he started the truck and sped away, leaving me to listen to my breath once again.

Word count: 999
 
Second Place
# 3
3

Nature found a way to get through to humans, and it’s happened in some of the weirdest ways. For example, my best friend is a shark named Quasar.

How it happened, I have no idea, but I’m glad of it. Being able to ”˜meet and greet’ sharks and talk to them about the oceans has been a tremendous help to me in my studies in Marine Biology. It’s led to a slew of laws protecting sharks and their reefs as well as stricter enforcement of those laws, and it all came about because of a gill net, a particularly-nasty death for fish and other marine life.

People are always asking me how I met Quasar, a seventeen-foot-long sphyrna mokorran, commonly referred to as the hammerhead shark, and since I’m tired of telling the story over and over, I decided to publish the story in print. If anyone wants to know, they can read this blog.

Don’t hurt me!

Dude, chill, was the first thing to cross my mind. I can’t speak with a regulator in my mouth, and I wasn’t about to try. I’m not gonna hurt you.

As soon as it was free of the netting, it darted away from me and vanished into the depths leaving me to gather the net and wonder if that shark did, in fact, tell me not to hurt it.

Sharks don’t speak, normal people don’t hear voices, so something was going on. And I frankly, I don’t like not knowing what’s going on or worse, if something might be wrong with me.

Thankfully, during my week-long assignment to headquarters afterward, I didn’t hear a single peep while working in the aquariums. And unless an actual, real, live human being was speaking to me, I didn’t hear any voices. I didn’t hear any strange sounds, or get a tune stuck in my head either, so I figured the incident was caused by a combination of dehydration, heat, and my imagination.

Fast-forward two weeks, and I was back in the open water once more, this time to chart coral growth in the reefs.

In addition to being mean, nasty things, octopi are highly-territorial creatures. They’ve drowned a lot of unwary divers in the past, and it looked like I was going to be next when the damned thing grabbed the hose near my mouthpiece and yanked on it while trying to strangle me.

Unfortunately, I have only two arms, and they’re outnumbered two-to-one by tentacles, making this fight a losing battle.

At any distance, octopi are a lot of things, but pretty isn’t one of them. They’re big, bulbous, floppy things with huge eyes and a beak- yes, I said beak- that can slice through a hose with ease, and the beak did just that before taking a fist-sized chunk out of my right biceps before suddenly belching a cloud of black ink and pulling me left, nearly ripping all my teeth out when it pulled on my regulator hose.

Weirdly enough, the attack ended as suddenly as it began, and the octopus shot off in a cloud of murky darkness.

You are injured.

That voice again. Cultured, smooth, baritone… it almost reminded me of Alan Rickman, but why he’d be doing a voice-over for a shark was beyond me. How he was doing it, since he retired from acting almost two-hundred years ago, was anyone’s guess.

Anyhow, I did the smart thing when dealing with a hammerhead shark whose head is almost four feet across from eyeball to eyeball: I froze.

Ah… dudechill?

A shark was calling me dude and telling me to chill? Yeah, I needed O2 in the worst way… and some anti-psychotics wouldn’t hurt either.

I’m not gonna hurt you?

I backed away and glanced at my dive clock. I was almost out of time, but the way my air hose was leaking, I didn’t trust my watch.

I headed for the surface, and you can imagine my panic when the shark nudged me upward with its head, but for some reason, it didn’t attack me even though hammerheads are known to be notoriously-aggressive, opportunistic feeders that attack any creature showing signs of distress.

I was injured and bleeding, yet it didn’t attack- not even an investigational bite, and that’s not normal for any species of shark.

I will not harm you.

I looked at the shark. “What the…?”

Take my fin. I will get you to the shallow water.

“I’m fine,” I answered, but what I was thinking was: I’m losing it.

What are you losing?

“What?”

You said you were losing it. What have you lost? Perhaps I can help you find it.

“I’m hearing voices.”

I hear nothing.

I looked down at the shark. It understood me? How? Sharks that size have brains the size of softballs. They’re anything but intelligent by any definition of the word.

Take my fin. I will get you to safety.

My canoe was near the shore, and the way I was bleeding, there was no way I’d be able to swim back without attracting a host of sharks looking for a meal.

Not sure why, I gently grabbed the dorsal fin and let the shark tow me to the shore where I promptly took off my tank and fins and went for my first-aid kit.

“I’m losing my mind.” I peeled off my ripped and slashed wetsuit and noticed that I was going to have some serious bruises in the morning… and some expensive gear to replace.

Anyway, according to my doctor and a couple of board-certified psychiatrists, I wasn’t losing my mind. I’m apparently one of those exceptionally-rare people who can communicate with animals. There aren’t many of us, and a ”˜shark whisperer’, for want of a better description, is definitely a first, but I can communicate with sharks, and thanks to that strange ability, I met my best friend, Quasar.

Word count: 989
Please do not critique my entry.
 
4
By d0ubl3t4k3s (Score: 4.901)
3

Once it crossed my mind, I couldn't let it go. Could there be someone out there who is exactly like me?
Not a person who has shared all my experiences, but rather one who embodies all my values, equal in passion and drive, love of humor... thinks outside the box. He would sacrifice for others, deal honorably with those having grievances against him, be dynamic, not afraid to change. He would be aware.
But more to the point, would I even recognize him. Could we have passed and because of my own, OUR own self absorbed ways; we missed an opportunity to connect. As a result of this failure, we lost the potential of becoming a team to be reckoned with. An unstoppable union with limitless possibilities.
It would be somebody that makes eye contact, and who shows interest in others endeavors.
Not a selfish type absorbed with themselves. He would be conscious of his surroundings. I'm sensitive to those around me for the most part... right?

I can rule people out, certainly. I have met many that I detest. They don't respond to a quip and sometimes they make you fell foolish for the attempt. Once a car wash attendant asked if I was the maroon Voyager... I replied, "No, I'm Batman." His blank expression revealed he wasn't one to be taken by surprise.
I could have encountered an identical embodiment of myself already, at a checkout counter, a workman that has been in my home. I've never made an effort to find him. It hadn't occurred to me this was plausible. Of course it could be attainable. Where else would the concept of 'soul mate' come from. He would hate the syrupy new-age image that the term 'soul mate' evokes by the way. Why would it have to be a male. She would hate the expression too!

So how would I go about finding this elusive twin. It wouldn't be as easy as finding my doppelganger, physical appearance has nothing to do with the workings of mind, soul, and spirit.

But wait, he would be looking for me even as I speak. For me to come up with this quest at this point in history would mean that he has had this exact same revelation. Is it as simple as the Empire State Building at New Year's Eve? Sadly, I think that would be unreasonable. No telling where this person is on the planet.

However, this is the world on technological steroids! Youtube, bloggers, forums of every interest imaginable. Would he share my exact hobbies? Would that be essential? He would be talented, creative but certainly not the top of the stack. That would bring vanity and make him unapproachable. Could I provide a questionnaire so foolproof as to reveal to us both that we are connected? Alas, I think the internet could also have its flakes as well. The dishonest with their attempts to connect for personal gain or inclinations of outright hostility.

Honesty is a must. Honesty would be everything. Not only similar perceptions of truth, but concrete provable tried and tested, as if in a laboratory, able to be repeated, truth.

This is seemingly more daunting a task than I had first perceived. As if an initial contact between two people totally in agreement, and being able to recognize each other as so, might be, well... unlikely. Perhaps the similarities can only happen with time, testing, honing that consists of and occurs out of conflict. Resolutions that sharpen each other's wit, resolve and character.

Yet maybe this meeting has already taken place. Perhaps it has taken years for it to have come to my attention. What could have been the catalyst, the attraction that could have captured my will so as to pursue this match.
Ah yes, I remember now. It would be in youth, when our defenses are down and motivation is blind to the potential pitfalls of life.
I would frequent a skating rink. No reason for being there, other than to be there. The magnetic force that caught my eye? She had this way of using one leg when she skated that made her stand out in a crowd, and emphasized certain... attributes. This attraction would later turn into an awareness of character and beauty and truth. I would need twenty eight years to recognize it is all. She still tells the maroon Voyager story. Maybe with a little too much emphasis on the blank expression.

Word count: 744
Please do not critique my entry.
 
Third Place
# 5
5

It was 15 years ago that I met the afterlife face to face. It took place the day after I turned 17, early that morning to be exact. I woke up needing to pee. While this is not an uncommon occurrence it was, on that morning, something I would not soon forget. As I entered the bathroom, dizziness overcame me and I lost consciousness. A few minutes later, when I came to, I wobbled into my parent’s room and informed them of what had happened, only to pass out again, falling across them. Now this was definitely not normal for a 17 year old boy, so when I came to the second time, I was being rushed by my parents to the hospital. Now this is the part where age has started to fade things. I don't remember getting to the hospital or being admitted. The next thing I do remember is being looked at by a doctor and nurse; I even remember the words that caused my premature death.

"Nurse, put a line in him."

Now, to this point in my life, I had always had a problem with needles. They always made me pass out. For some reason though, this time was different. As soon as the nurse had finished placing the IV into my arm, I turned my head to look at my mother -- and flat lined.

I awoke sitting up on a cot in a small dark room. All I could make out was the outline of a door and a tiny barred window. A bright light was coming from over my shoulder, I turned to see if the light was coming through a window or what not, unfortunately the light was so bright I couldn't tell. I also remember that there was the sound of a thousand people, all frantically screaming to get out. The best description of the thunderous amounts of screaming would be to equate it to a prison on fire with prisoners trapped inside their cells. As the screams were becoming almost unbearable, everything became completely black and completely silent. Two spot lights popped on side by side about 10 feet infront of me, the light on the left was shining down on a slender dark haired man dressed in a black suit, while the light on the right shone down on a similar blond haired man dressed in a white suit. A third spot light was shining on me. I was certainly not in the little room any longer. Then a booming voice was heard.

"The discussion to determine the eternal fate of the one known as Tyn Mann will now began."

This was when I realized that I was dead, then fear of where I could end up set in.

"This one is mine."

The man in black was quite sure of his statement while the man in white wore a little smirk.

"I think not. Look closer."

The man in black stared hard at me.

"Gabriel, I see nothing that makes him yours."

"Lawrence, look deep. He has a good heart."

Lawrence turned away from me in disgust, then turned back and pointed directly at me.

"You are wrong. He has no heart. He is exuse the pun a tin man, a heartless shell."

Gabriel just calmly, silently stood there.

"Since you can't dispute that, I will take what is mine."

Gabriel stood the with his hand by his side still with a slight smirk, I was begining to feel as if I already knew where I was going. I was terrified. He must have sensed my fear cause he looked at me and winked.

"Lawrence, I think we should look at the book of truth, I believe that you are miss judging him."

Suddenly a book appeared floating in air just infront of them. It opened and Lawrence pulled a pair of glasses out his inside coat pocket and put them on. Gabriel didn't look at the book, he instead continued to look at me. Lawrence noticed that he wasn't looking at the book and motioned for it come closer to him, he began reading it to himself until he appeantly found what he was looking for.

"Here it is, the act that started his ruthless reputation."

Still Gabriel did not look at the book, only at me with the same smirk.

"Look at the date Lawrence. He hasn't commeted that act yet. He is early and that can't be considered yet."

A look of discuss appeared on lawrence's face, he must have known that Gabriel was right. Gabriel winked at me as a different booming, faceless voice echoed from overhead.

"Clear!"

"No, he's mi ..."

I opened my eyes, and saw the doctor and nurse standing over me. It was only three and one-half minutes, but I have never been the same. I now live each day as the kindest and warmest person I can be, trying not to be as Lawrence said, a tin man.

Word count: 828

This is a semi-autobiographical story, I will let you decide at what point my imagination took over. I hope you enjoy a story that is based on my real experience.