Unlike other Presidents, Teller will never say something offensive to diplomatic allies, nor will he make grammatical errors or invent words! Running mate: Penn Jillette.

He's fought drugs, undead pirates, and teenage pimps. Now he plans to fight for you -- this November 2nd, vote Johnny Depp for President.

Don't be confused by the issues! Elect a man who has his own!
Elect Dart Brightmare to City Council.

Vote Big Brother for Supreme Leader. (In fact, you already did!)

Castro for United States President! Decades of nation level leadership experience! Excellent record of diplomacy with Russia and other countries! Guaranteed to supress guerilla insurgence!

Ellen DeGeneres for President

"Lick Bush in 2004!"

"You've got to know when to hold 'em... know when to explode them."

Cast your vote for knowledge, integrity, justice, and fairness! Keep a man in office who has proven himself!
(paid for by the Metropolitan Drug Dealers Association)

"Hey! I'm not my brother!"

Light up the polls, smoke the compition and exhlale your vote. Make flavor country YOUR country vote Marlboro Man your president in 2004!