Forget everything you ever knew about desperation, despair, and demotivation. This movie will cycle your emotions from exasperating anguish to complete desolation.
And back again.
And again.
Because no matter how hard you tried, or how much pain you suffered - it just wasn’t good enough.

Misery, dejection and gloom - that’s nothing compared to Fourth Place.

Logophobia- John thought he had his inane fear of large words under control when he moved to Arkansas. That all changed the day his doctor informed him that he had pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis. Now it's a man vs. dictionary battle royale.
You never know when your words will come back to haunt you.

Calculus: The nerve-wracking sequel from the makers of last year’s mind-numbing over length feature, Algebra. It will set your teeth on edge! Resistance is useless! Prepare to be integrated!

Your hands will never feel clean again.

A razor-sharp knife, wielded with clinical precision.

Slicing into the soft underbelly of an innocent, cold-blooded ichthyoid.

Glibbery entrails dumped unceremoniously in an adjoining bucket.

Empty your bag of popcorn quickly, because you will need some place to put your lunch when you watch:

How to gut a fish.

(A Technicolor Yawn Production)

PHOTOSHOPPERS - They'll "chop" you into something you're not, and mercilessly manipulate you.
Watch them "zombie-fy" you, make you disappear, or transform you into an animal even your mother will not love.

Rating: NSFW

She thought it would be simple. She thought it would be straightforward. She didn't think driving carpool would find her dazed and confused in the nameless, faceless streets of suburbia, trying to find that one last seven year old to take to soccer practice.

Step. Set breakpoint. Step. Curse. Reboot. Set breakpoint. Curse.

This movie will take you to the depths of human self-deception. For three hours. Repent now, for there are people who do this for days!

If there is any task more tedious, any job more jaded, any work more worthless, it just hasn’t made it out of the seventh circle of Purgatory yet.

Sit down, detach your higher brain functions, and watch: Debugging.

Don't go outside this summer. Theres something out there. Something worse than any dinosaur. Something G.I. Joe is powerless to stop. Its worse than a dragon, Worse than any monster... This summer, Nori Films Inc. presents: Cooties- the story of a young boy who finds an infected Barbie, and the disease which plagued him 'till high-school.

Rated PG, due to scary scenes involving makeup and dolls.

No one knew Aunt Gertrude was capable of such unspeakable evil. No one suspected a thing until the day she did something so unexpected... so vile... so utterly horrific that would torment us for the rest of our days.

It was the day Aunt Gertrude gave our three year old son a drum set.

Three months ago John was brutally assaulted. Today he will wake from his coma and announce the names of his attackers. Trish wishes she could be home for it, but she has to work. Little does she know that she will never get to hear his announcement. Her video tape only has five minutes left on it and she will miss this pivotal episode of Days of Our Lives.