“Chase Jackson” A giant voice boomed down the chimney. “You have been VERY NAUGHTY!!” Chase wasn’t listening; he had leapt from the chair and sprinted through from the room, down the hallway and into the armory. All manner of weaponry hung on the wall, from swords and spears to rifles and shotguns. There was even a case that held his favorite pistols. There, there it was! He grabbed his bo staff from where it leaned in the corner and backed out of the room, kicking off his slippers as he went.
“Chase Jackson, you naughty, naughty boy!” The voice was massive, sonorous in a way that shook the very foundations of Chase’s massive mansion. “You will have more than coal in your stocking this year!” Chase stalked slowly down the red-carpeted hallway. The lights that hung from the ceiling swayed suddenly as there was a loud crash from the living room where Chase had just been sitting a moment earlier.
“Who are you?” Chase called from threshold of the hallway. The front door was directly across the foyer from the aperture of the hall where Chase stood. The kitchen was on his left and on the right was the living room where, Chase suspected, the intruder now stood, waiting. “What do you want?”
Laughter, long and loud echoed throughout the entire building. “I am St. Nictus, twin brother to the one you call ‘Santa Clause’ and usurper to the throne and crown of Christmas" Chase was shocked. He had no idea that Santa had a brother! “Now, young Chase Jackson… come out from where you’re hiding and do battle with me.” This nutcase obviously had to be stopped, or Christmas would be ruined forever!
With grim determination, Chase stepped out from the hallway entrance, into the grand room. Standing there, clad in a red jump suit lined with black fur stood the largest, fattest man he had ever seen. Fully seven feet tall with fists the size of cinder blocks, the giant stood at his full height under the room’s twelve foot ceiling. He stank like cigarette smoke and cheap booze and his face was lined with deep, dirt encrusted wrinkles. Chase had these observations noted in the blink of an eye and before another word could be spoken he sprang into action.
Planting the butt of the bo staff on the floor he catapulted himself up onto the bookcases lining the wall and using the staff as purchase on the floor ran along the cases parallel to the ground. The giant old goblin saw him coming and with inhuman speed for a man of his size easily ducked aside as Chase finished his semi-airborne charge with a flying kick. Recovering was simple for the smaller man and as his feet connected with the ground instead of their intended target he tucked into a roll and came back upright, whirling the staff overhead to bring it to rest along his forearm and tucked under his shoulder. Feet apart, arms spread and bo staff at the ready, Chase waited the evil giant’s charge.
The massive man snarled and spat into the fireplace and with one hand brushed aside the chair the young warrior had occupied earlier, clearing a path to his victim. The entire house shook as the titan took three steps to cover the distance and began to lay about him with gigantic fists. Blocking was out of the question for Chase, so instead he used his speed and skill with his weapon to deflect those blows that he could not directly avoid. Around the room they chased each other, speed and skill vs. strength and size. Each punch thrown by St. Nictus either missed its target entirely or slid along the bo staff to swing wide, while Chase’s own hits landed about the head, shoulders and stomach with little to no effect.
Backing up, always retreating, Chase knew that this could not end well for him. He could not avoid the behemoth or block his blows much longer. He had to find some way to hurt this juggernaut! Just as the hairy old villain reached out for him one last time the young man tripped backwards over a lamp that had been knocked down in the tussle. His foot came up as he went over backwards and connected squarely with the smelly old man's groin.
“Oh, oh, oh….” Was all that was uttered from that massive mouth as two huge knees came together. Eyes wide, mouth in an ‘O’ and hands cupped over the injured area, the titan fell over to one side.
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“Well, Chase, it seems you’ve been busy this Christmas Eve.” Santa said as he stood beside the hero gazing at his brother’s unconscious form.
“You could say that, Santa” Chase quipped “It seems St. Nictus’ weakness was his jingle balls.”