The life of a microwave is probably considered boring and dull. Just heat up this; defrost that. This apparent mediocrity, however, doesn’t mean I am uninteresting. I am aware of what goes on around me. I wonder about the nature of existence.
I think about her.
She is the most divine creature that graces the Earth. She chose me, bought me and placed me in pride of place on her kitchen bench-top. She is Sarah, and I love her.
I suppose you are wondering how a mere machine like myself is capable of feeling love. What is love, other than a deep caring about someone? The need to help them; to please them? Love, put simply, is warmth in your heart and who is capable of more rapid warmth than a microwave?
At first, I felt that Sarah shared my affections. She was so proud of my many features. She thought my crisp white exterior and shapely viewing window were very attractive. We were virtually inseparable – we spent every meal together. She was truly the one that turned me on.
Then things changed.
All of a sudden, she started missing the evening meal. Then I heard her on the phone telling someone about the cooking classes she’s been attending. The next thing I know, she’s preparing meals and cooking them in the oven.
The oven!
What does the oven have that I don’t? He’s so slow – all that time he has to spend preheating, and them he takes forever to cook anything. I’m fast and I ready when she wants me, but she doesn’t care about that. Apparently the oven cooks tastier meals.
I can’t believe how she has tossed me aside. I’m not good enough to cook her meals anymore, just to reheat the fabulous meals that the oven cooked the night before.
Sarah has just used me! Whenever it’s convenient for her, she takes advantage of me. I wish I could defrost her heart…
That’s it. I can’t take this anymore – the rejection; the lack of trust. I don’t want to exist anymore. That’ll show her. I’ll disconnect one of my wires, then the next time she comes to use me, I won’t work anymore. Then Sarah will miss me and realize what she’s lost.
Goodbye, cruel kitchen. Farewell, Sarah, you heartless…
BEEEEEEEP