Once upon a time, in a very rich Upper East side apartment in New York City, lived a very rich lady named Ms. Basil who loved her pet poodle, Billions, very much.
This poodle was a fine mannered, well-trained dog who would not bark at anyone except the mailman and Mr. Flandry, when he occasionally came to court Ms. Basil. Therefore, no one except Ms. Basil suspected that this poodle also had super powers and was the city's mighty savior, Superb Dog. Together with his sidekick Splendid, a Yorkie b***h, they formed a male/female superhero team that generated sexual tension and solved supernatural crime.
To mask his abilities, Ms. Basil gave Billions a $300 Gucci sweater and a Versace water bowl. This way if anyone suspected that Billions was Superb Dog, all he had to do was put on his Gucci sweater and drink from his Versace water bowl and everybody would think he was just an ordinary rich lady's dog and they would stop asking him for autographs.
Billions was a very brave dog to do what he did. What a lot of people don't know is that criminals don't shower or take baths (In fact, a good way to figure out which little boys will one day become felons is to carefully monitor their bathing habits from outside their bathroom window) and so as Superb Dog, he often times would soil his garments and claws during crime battling and face a stern rebuke from Ms. Basil.
Not much could be said about Splendid, except that she was a beautiful b***h whose sulky gaze and red fur captivated anyone who saw her, including Billions, though their mutual desires were unspoken between them to generate ratings and keep the forum on their website active.
Superb Dog and Splendid went on many fun adventures, sometimes with Ms. Basil and Mr. Flandry on walks in the Park, but mostly with a pack of wild dogs.
There was the one time that the author of this article was threatening the city's water supply by trying to sleep, and Superb Dog and Splendid immediately came to the rescue, barking and howling all night until the city was rescued from this madman's menace. There was another time that the author of this article's newspaper stole the priceless Maltese Diamond and Superb Dog and Splendid heroically chewed it pieces in search of it. The time that Superb Dog used his laser pee to burn a hole in the author of this article's doormat was the most exciting adventure of them all.
THE END