A strong ego was the only requirement for success in politics. Morality? HA! In this day and age, morals only hold you back. Intellect? “You gotta talk to the voters at their level” was one of his campaign manager’s favorite aphorisms. Ideas? Put one forward and the special interests attack it like a hawk on a mouse, shredding it beyond recognition.
Jack sighed, a bad habit he had picked up in the last several weeks. At 2:00 a.m. he knew he had to get some sleep – another packed schedule tomorrow. He rubbed his eyes and looked around the campaign office. Bumper stickers, lawn placards and lapel buttons all proclaimed “Jack-in-the-box for President: Time for Change.” But he was beginning to wonder if the population really wanted change. Sure, they want it, if it is at the expense of someone else. But to even suggest that privileges be taken away from one group results in a drop in the polls.
It started years ago. The teddy bears had a lock on power and used it to cement their position. Subsidized picnics and tea parties were theoretically open to any citizen, but legislation allowed them to set limitations that essentially proscribed anything but bear participation. Non-ursine contingents could not get a paw-hold into the corridors of power.
That imbecile, Winnie, had spoiled everything. Honey flowed like water and a sizable contingency of bears had fled the corruption and favoritism of the Pooh-ites. Infrastructure had been neglected to a dangerous degree. Most horrifying was the lack of care for the sick and elderly. Sure the bears have their specialists, but let a pig or a platypus get injured and where can they go? Eventually, when it gets bad enough, they show up at the free clinic and get moldy stuffing or mismatched eyes or a peanut for a nose. It was a disgrace.
Jack started at the sound of a soft knock on the door. Damn, he had fallen asleep at his desk again. He needed a hot shower and a strong cup of coffee to get the spring back in his step. His assistant, a long time aide, brought the necessary coffee in and set it on the desk. “Jack, you have to take better care of yourself. This is a long campaign and when it is over, the hard work will just be starting.” She pulled a stack of clippings out of her pouch and laid them in front of Jack. “Polls are up again. That speech to the action figures yesterday was a big hit. All of the columnists liked it.” She smiled. Jack never once regretted taking on a kangaroo as his assistant, despite all the warnings that those big feet would never work in an office.
The coffee, the shower, clean clothes and a look at the clippings re-energized Jack. He had several appearances today and those were what made him continue the arduous process of campaigning. Interviews with journalists, negotiations with sitting legislators, the horror of fund raising, and listening to the inane pundits sapped his energy. Give him days like today and he could do this forever.
This morning’s first speech was a typical bedroom talk: a mix of old and young, big and small, weak and powerful, worn and pristine. He would cover his standard litany of issues: equal access to resources, elimination of subsidies on luxuries, rotating the front of the shelf position. Everyone should have a fair chance at being selected to spend time on the bed. That was his pet peeve. The bigger and more assertive toys would push the smaller, sweeter ones to the back of the shelf, where they would never even be seen. Jack was pumped up, ready to go out and take the world by storm!
Jack heard his campaign manager making the introductions. At first he was worried that a green wooly mammoth would seem frivolous or flamboyant to the voters, but just the opposite. Angus had endeared himself to the public with his witty comments and his genuine compassion. Another great addition to his staff, Jack reminded himself. This was no one-man-show.
Loud applause, horns, whistles (wolf and otherwise) signaled his entry. Jack looked out over the crowd: dogs, pigs, sheep and a heaping serving of bears. The adrenaline burst through his springs, his smile widened and he stepped up to the podium.
“My fellow citizens, the time has come for change.”