I refuse to follow Twitter.
To me it’s just a spam transmitter.
I don’t care to read the litter
Tweeted by “Joe Blow” submitter.
Some news isn’t worth the glitter;
I don’t need to hear the chitter
Raised by every dang fencesitter
With a handheld crap emitter.
True milestones befit the titter -
Labor and delivery jitter,
“Waiting for a transplant” sitter.
Update me NOW, you button hitter!
But lose your socks? I will get bitter.
Bored at work? I’m a throat slitter.
Drunk again? Be an omitter.
Tweet stupid stuff and I’m a quitter.