5) … oh, you meant THAT Portland, I guess we'll see you in a week and it will cost an extra five grand.
4) A few Eastern Diamondback Rattlesnakes escaped from the other cargo we were moving and we could not find them all, so we think that some of them are hiding in your furniture.
3) Jack Bauer 'borrowed' the truck and the police said we can have what is left after they finish their investigation.
2) Remember when you said that one of our laborors wasn't looking too well, you were right. The Center for Disease Control is on their way, apparently your family needs be quarratined for two weeks while all of your furniture gets disenfected.
1) We will be sending some of our best workers to assist you in your move, the foreman's name is Larry and his helpers are Moe and Curly.