Dear Boss,
They call me Saucy Jack, I think it's most unfair -
I'm not some common ruffian from a gin soaked harlot's lair!
I do not cut them quickly, and I do not cut them slow,
My work requires an expertise, to be performed just so.
A quick slice in the darkness; well, it wouldn't do, you see?
A butcher's floor is not the place for an artisan like me.
Dear Boss, I hope you understand - for myself, I am aware,
That time is passing all too fast, and I have so much more to share.
I'm getting better all the time at this lovely work I do,
Next time I'll take the lady's ears and I'll post them straight to you!
Or maybe something nicer that might do you for a treat?
A strumpet's heart or liver, that would certainly be sweet!
Oh Boss, I know you'll do your best to catch me if you can,
But where do you begin, old chap? You can't know who I am!
Or why I do these things I do, and just what might be my aims?
Well, you'll have to wait like all the rest for my funny little games,
Grand work the last job was, Dear Boss, she had no time to squeal,
The next one will be better yet, I have plans I won't reveal.
They say I am a surgeon; then they say I am a thief,
It doesn't matter in the end, well at least that's my belief,
Ha Ha! Today the papers say Her Majesty's my mother -
Dear Boss, my knife is nice and sharp, and I'm keen to do another.
I'll cut them up, and dice them up and I'll fry them like a kipper!
My work has only just begun -
Yours Truly,
Jack The Ripper.