Expressing the Truth 3

All work and no play means Jack's employer has an awesome firewall.

Hell hath no fury like a cat being bathed.

A man's home is his castle and if married, is ruled by a queen.

Our days are numbered, we keep track using a calendar.

Beauty is in the eye of the magazine editors and television executives.

The more a man knows, the more annoying he gets.

The Late Worm avoids the Early Bird !

Speak now or forever hold resentment that they found love before you.

A friend in need, is a friend you want to keep around until they have paid you back.

A place for everything and everything in its place is good for childless homes. For homes with children, just finding it eventually can be nice.

A watched pot never boils, but an unwatched pot makes a mess of the stove.

Actions speak louder than words...unless you're in a crowded restaurant with a 3-year-old.

Friends in high places are out of reach when you are down.

A stitch in time saves much embarrassment at the beach.

If you hitch your wagon to a star, try to pick one that's not in rehab. They have enough problems.

Ask not what your country can do for you: Just shut up and pay your taxes.

A heart as big as Texas usually means blood flow to the brain is restricted.

Keep body and soul together, unless attempting astral projection.

You can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink; though if you try really hard you can drown it.

There's no such thing as a free lunch, unless you don't mind dumpsters.

Beat around the bush, and you'll find yourself a bachelor all your life.

Absence makes the heart grow cold, bitter and undoubtably paranoid.

Where there's smoke, there's also second hand smoke.

When Money talks...Everyone is all Ears !!!

All that glitters distracts the intoxicated.

Don't bite the hand that feeds you, unless it's holding brussels sprouts.

The early bird gets the worm, but all of the other birds get to sleep in.

Talk is cheap without a cellular phone.

There's more than one way to skin a cat...but all will probably get you arrested.

Every family has a skeleton in the closet... which they pull out and put on the Jerry Springer show.

Don't cry over spilt milk. Spilt gasoline, on the other hand, is well worth crying over.

The chop is mightier than the source.

A lie told often enough is still a lie.

The best things in life are free of set-up fees, late payment penalties, and credit card limits.

A slap speaks a thousand words!

Ask not what your country can do for you, it really doesn't care anyway!

Blood is thicker than water, unless you're a hemophiliac.

Be careful what you wish for ... you just might get it, and then you'll realize that wishes do come true and you just wasted a perfectly good wish on something stupid when you should have wished for something totally awesome like the new Yahama FX Waverunner with the 1.8 liter intercooled engine.

A picture is worth a thousand dollars, if painted by someone famous.

He who can, does.
He who can't, writes silly phrases hoping to inspire others to do it for him.

It’s a woman’s prerogative to change her mind; just say ‘Yes dear’ and move on.

Hit the nail on the head or risk bruised and broken fingers.

If music be the food of love, I'd like fries with that.

A penny for your thoughts
leaves me with a 100% profit margin;
upon hearing your Two Cents worth !

Great minds think alike but even the mentally challenged know when it's time to eat.

We have nothing to fear but... those hairy, black spiders scurrying up our legs!

Where there's a will... theres a way to screw it up.

One penny saved is not enough.

Easy come,easy go; but casinos always win.

Nothing is certain but death and taxes - in that order.

A watched pot never boils until it reaches 100 degrees Celsius (or 212 degrees Fahrenheit) at which point it commences to boil in a perfectly normal manner regardless of whether or not you've been watching it.

Don't put all your eggs in one basket. Go to the fertilization clinic to conceive.

If you give a man a fish, he'll eat for one day, and if you teach a man to fish, he'll have fish for the rest of his life, but, if you give a man thousands of fish, he'll have fish for the rest of his life and you wont have to spend time teaching him to fish.

A friend in need had better pay me back later.

He who is an idiot, will remain clueless...

"We're all in this together!"

TRANSLATED: "We're all keeping you around to blame"

Anything than can go right, will eventually go left.

When truth comes knocking at your door, don't play games.

Until they pass gas and make everyone run for cover.

Reap what you sow
The future is in your hands

He who can, does. He who can't, works for a low salary as a boring teacher at a highschool where he sits alone when he eats his ham sandwich lunch and has been divorced twice because he can't support his wife.

A Penny Saved isn't worth a plugged nickel.

Caught between a rock and an Insurgent Dugout.

Three people can keep a secret, Only if two are dead, and the third is deaf.

Let sleeping dogs Lie...'Cause the truth hurts !!!

Mankind differs from the animals only by a little, they usually have less fur.

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Unless of-course, you fall of a building and are paralyzed for the rest of your life.

A penny saved...isn't very much.

Everything always looks better from far away until you get there and find out its artificial...

A Penny Saved Is...Not Much.

Just between you, and me, and the post..... and the fifty other people I know you're dying to tell.

A house divided against itself was probably better off being built by an amateur.

A politician can't change his motives.

A penny saved is a penny that someone else dropped on the ground.

You can't watch the baker bake the cake, and then eat it!

Don't use a lot where recession strikes.

Original

Don't use a lot where a little will do.

You sound like a Skippin' C.D. !!!

It is possible to describe a circle with any center and any radius…if you passed math in high school and know what the heck your doing

Three can keep a secret, Only if two are deaf and dumb.

All men are not cast in the same hospital.

Original

All men are not cast in the same mold.

Don't judge a book by Internet comments,it takes so long to buy it.

Original

Don't judge a book by its cover