As a sequel to the last contest, we'd like to hear what you think celebrities first words would have been (if babies could talk), as in Anni's example above. The rules of the game are thus: Pick a celebrity. What would be the first words out of his or her mouth? Sad, funny, ironic--it's up to you, but keep it clean. One celebrity per entry, please.Keep in mind that profanity is not acceptable. All entries must be in accordance with our text rules and guidelines. As always, quality is a must. You will have 7 days for this contest, so make your submission count.Word Limit: 50 words. Entries longer than 50 words will be disqualified.
My acting skills are not as I desire;Still, I crave a life of onstage fire.I like to write in this iambic way -Perhaps I’ll try to write myself a play
George Carlin: Let’s see, my first seven words should be legendary…
Now observe as I magically detach myself from the umbilical cord..
Outracing all of those other little white things nine months ago was pretty tough, but SOMEhow, I made it. Now, if I could only somehow parlay that talent into a successful career...
" and that is how you hold your breath for nine months."
When I grow up I am going to become President...Why is everybody laughing?
OK, how about we push the "intelligence" attribute to maximum... And put the rest of the points into Charisma. Strength? Dexterity? Who needs them?
I can’t stand all this rain. Mom, Dad, I’m gonna go hang out in the garage.
Hey! Some man's been here before!
Hey cutie, how about we ditch these pacifiers and meet over at my rubber pool?
Harry Houdini - "Ha! You can't hold me! I've escaped and I'll do it again!"
Lucille Ball: I better start practicing, waaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!
I wonder where you go around here to meet chicks?
*Sobbing* Daddy never lets me play with knives. Watch, when I get older I’m going to be rich and have a lot of knives…
I WANT MY MOMMY!!!!
Hey Mom, You're hired!
"Barbie's taste like plastic, there's got to be something I can bite the head off of that tastes good."
Spank me again...I dare you, I double dare you!
"Wow! A second nurse just fainted! I wonder if I can do something with this!"
Man, look at this place! This would look great in magazine pictures!
"The first thing that needs changing is my diaper!"
Jenna Jameson: "Spank me!"
Bernard Madoff - "Thank you for the job Sir, you won't regret it."
" my pampers feels really tight .."
Bruce Willis :" If you slap me again, I'll kill you !"
Gosh darn! "Sarah"??? Were Foxtrout and Salmon taken or somethin'?!
Okay, you can turn on the lights now.
My name is WC Fields and I want to be an alcoholic.
Anna Nicole Smith: I will never marry for money
Four times a week for 7 years, my father finally brought forth on this bed… a new baby! Abe Lincoln
Please, look at me...Look at me I'm a good girl...(cries so loudly that every one looks at her with pity)
"Maybe I should stay out of the family business, and be a professor like my dad..."
My goodness, what is that delightful feeling? Peeing you say...hmmm. I love it...so freeing, so liberating.....
If I ever end up rich and famous, I think I'd die from shock...!
Angelina Jolie: I don't want kids
(**singing**) I juuust caaan't waaait to be kiiiiiiing!!
"I am funny! Laugh with me people hahahaha
"I will I will ROCK YOU!!"
Angelina Jolie: I Want A Lot Of Kids, Like As Many As A Football Team.
It’s a Big Saturday Night! Catch Me in the Forrest of Philadelphia Walking the Green Mile with Private Ryan and my Band of Brothers trying not to be Cast Away to all the Angels and Demons in which I Love & Like.
"You'll be saying WOW every time! Especially when you see what I get arrested for!"
Russell Crowe: Violence and telephones, do not mix
This is going to be great! I will be the only guy in Major League baseball on steroids, and I will totally KICK ASS!
Mom when I grow up I'll be-- I'll b-e--e a fa-a--mous sin-sin-ger!(Stuttering)
" Congrats! A baby boy!" said Dr.Man.Everyone looks at baby Kurt."Yuck!!" Kurt says "Smells like doctor spirit!"
Helen Keller - "Oh thank goodness, I had read everything in there a thousand times"
I can't to grow up and buy babies.
"Where?!"